johnsmachines

She Who Must be Obeyed, SWMBO, has some remarkable attributes. First, she has very good taste, as evidenced by the fact that she married me.

Second, she is smart, personable, and in my eyes beautiful.

However, after we were married (having “gone out” for 6 years), I learned that she had some unusual skills. One of which was a “Dr Doolittle” like affinity with animals. In fact, in our verbal prenuptial contract was a clause that I had to agree to living with cats. Siamese cats to be specific. We had a succession of these intelligent, bossy animals over several decades. Much like SWMBO. I quite liked them. They just tolerated me. We also had beagles. And later, cavalier spaniels. The cats dominated the dogs.

Then, about 10 years ago, the last beagle and cavalier died, and we decided that we were at an age where we would like to do some travelling without worrying about placement of the dogs and cats, and we would be pet free, apart from dog sitting and cat sitting the pets of our children from time to time.

A major factor in the decision to be pet free was that our house had become a visiting point for wild birds. In a hot summer, I had placed a water bowl high up out of reach of neighbours’ cats, and kept it full for the hot months. And SWMBO started placing seed rings for the visiting birds. I made the cats feel unwelcome by pelting them with rotten lemons. But they still managed to kill an occasional wild bird.

The water bowl was visited by scores of visiting birds every day, to drink and bathe. Sometimes I needed to refill it several times each day. And the seed rings were very popular. Magpies, sulfur crested cockatoos, ravens, rainbow lorikeets, galahs, currawongs, rosellas. SWMBO knew which seeds appealed to which bird varieties.

They were fascinating to watch. There were strict orders of precedence and pecking orders. We became aware that there were lookouts posted for when the seed rings were put out. A bird would squawk, then fly off, and return a few minutes later with his/her family. They even seemed to recognise my wife’s car arriving. They certainly recognised SWMBO herself.

Our favourites were the cockatoos. They would arrive singly, in recognisable family groups, and in flocks of 20-50. They would bring their chicks. And when the chicks had their own offspring, they would bring them. They tolerated me walking past, closer than a meter, as long as I did not look at them. SWMBO they totally trusted, taking food handed to them. The magpies were also much loved. They feel totally at home, sometimes walking into our kitchen if the door is open.

If the water bowl was empty the cockatoos would squawk, tip it over, or push it off the balcony.

Then yesterday, their pushy attitude reached a new level.

I was inside working on the computer, and ignoring a cockatoo’s cries for attention. A seed ring ring had been put out a few days earlier, and we are cognisant of the need to be occasional suppliers of food, rather than a regular source.

Suddenly I heard a clatter of a metal water bowl hitting the concrete paving. The cockatoo had pushed it off the balcony table . I continued to ignore it. Some time later I heard another thud as something else was pushed off. I continued to ignore it. The squarks seemed to settle.

A couple of hours later I went out and saw the source of the thud……